Tales From the Customer Service Crypt
Real stories. Real verdicts. Disney-inspired strategies that turn ordinary service businesses into unforgettable brands.
You Can't Think Your Way to a Thriving Business on a Diet of News-Porn and Outrage
by: Vance MorrisPublished on: 14/04/2026Most business owners are unknowingly destroying their most powerful asset; their thinking, with outrage cycles and gossip. Discover what proven entrepreneurs consume instead and why protecting your mental diet directly determines your profits.
"Botox" Killing Your Financial Advisory Authority
by: Vance MorrisPublished on: 12/03/2026Stop bleeding clients to the "Sea of Sameness." Discover how Systematic Magic™ and the Disney approach to experience engineering can build a titanium cage around your best wealth management clients.
What Ridiculous Wine Descriptions Teach Us About Customer Experience and Retention
by: Vance MorrisPublished on: 13/01/2026What absurd wine descriptions teach us about customer experience and retention and why confusion, not price, drives customers away.
The New York Times Buries Disney Under a Bucket of Paint!
by: Vance MorrisPublished on: 17/12/2024The New York Times erased Walt Disney from history... with paint.
CATEGORIES
Vance Morris
The ONLY Disney Experience & Direct Response Marketer, who actually worked at The Disney Company
Is Your Business Burying Customers Without Knowing It?
How I Judge Every Story
Every week I dig up a real customer experience, from the headlines or from my own life, and stamp it with one of four verdicts.
Risen From the Crypt: The rare business that shocks me in the best way. Somebody did something so right it deserves to be studied and stolen for your own shop. I show you the system behind it.
Signs of Life: A business that was flatlining and started breathing again. They're not there yet, but they're moving in the right direction, and the fix they made is one you can make too.
Cause of Death: An autopsy on an everyday failure. The small, ordinary letdowns that quietly kill loyalty in businesses everywhere, probably including yours. I name the cause and show you how to keep it out of your building.
DOA: Dead on Arrival: A decision so bad it never had a chance. These are the ones where I stop being polite, because somebody with a budget and a committee should have known better.
Recommended Reading
Systematic Magic: 7 Magic Keys To Disnify Your Business CLICK HERE
The Experience Economy by Pine (it's a bit dated, but the lessons and strategies are pure
goldpixie dustMaking the Magic: Customer Experience Boot Camp
The Most Unforgettable Event For Consultants & Coaches: CLICK HERE (a done-4-you boutique event at Walt Disney World)